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Curse And Regret

by Patient Zero

/
1.
(dear friends) I see you writhing there on the floor, I feel those tendrils in your head, your body wracked with dementia, easy to surrender, emotionally dead. tell me why I suffer to feel, remind me what it means to be, liar, a life without majesty, no love as you lie in your bed. behind those eyes, I see you paralyzed, frozen with fear, your decay is drawing near. let me help you die, better to sacrifice, to shed those ties, humanity will lie. (dear god) some days you're all I can think of and, sometimes I can't even breathe, somehow, I've got to get through this, I'm packing my bags but I can't seem to leave. I was so happy in love before, you broke me down to my knees, I stand now rapture in pain, my life is turmoil, I laugh as I bleed. what did they tell you? what did they say? what was they lie that they gave you today. get moving, left, right, get moving, alright.
2.
we the fallen, we the people, we those lucky born. we those given ill repute, we're here to raise those horns. criminals in cathode rays, redundant wedding bells, a pretty game I've never played, sending you straight to hell. evil, twisted, so sadistic, I know what you think of me, I won't play the martyr for your empathy. so forgive me little choirboy, but I won't apologize, your god has made you weak, but I can sympathize. get down on your knees, you might get lucky with your prayers, your imaginary friend doesn't know and doesn't care. the one creator made a flaw you see, 'cause he made me, though some maybe call it rhetoric, you know it's blasphemy. the air is poison consequently everybody you love is dead, no time to mourn the loss, maybe they're better off. tell me that you love me, swear allegiance to the king, my empire of vice would give you everything. all you always swore you'd never take, I'll make you ache for this.
3.
look what they did to you, it isn't fair, it isn't true, am I getting through to you? you're so fucking beautiful. what was it like at school? did they ever make you scream? do their words still haunt your dreams? wish that I could fix you. and did the stories spread, about the bugs that live in your head? and did all of your peers laugh, when you fell in the mud? I'd like to pick you up, dust you off give you some love, sorry I don't give a fuck what anybody says. you're still precious to me, they just can't see you for what's inside. you're perfect, just as you are, don't give in to their peer pressure. I'm sorry that the world is mean, I'm sorry that it's so obscene, don't stare into the TV screen, the people there are lies. I know it can be hard some days, I wish there was an easy way, a burden that we have to bare, for being so alive.
4.
Eins 03:35
5.
She's got a dirty mind, but she don't care, spreads her name, everywhere. In the dark she knows she's the best, drags her nails down your chest. I don't mind, I'm not the first, damn it lady, you're the worst. Make me sweat, make me swear, make me lose all sense of care. Hit me harder, damn I love it, take my body, slice and carve it. You're my addiction, you're my game, you're my affliction, give me more pain. My little lady, made of steel, stainless in this world of rust. My best friend, always there, fits so perfect in my right hand. Surgical, nigh automatic, beautiful scar tissue. Feed the cuts, join the dots, all I need to feel again. Try as I might, can't seem to find, any light, in my cell. I tried to change, give up the pain, know it's not the way, I know well. Cut through the skin, I'm warm within, my lady, my delight.
6.
Some cruel trick, that I guess god plays, reinforce the torture 'til our end of days. Why do I still love you? I want to hate you, but you still take my death away. Vicious words, that I shouldn't say, I don't remember what I said that day. Why do I take it? Why can't I walk away? Even when I dream you take my death away.
7.
8.
Stamp your feet or clap your hands, everybody came to dance, the rhythm is infectious and the band played on. Call me patient zero I'm the doctor on the stage, cut the track with surgery, injected with my rage, a pumping beat to move your feet, a pulse ready to blow, maybe I'm not happy but nobody would know. Let me go, let me go, let me go back to bed, I can't do this all night, I'm gonna wake up dead. let me go, let me go, let me turn out the lights, don't want to sing, don't want to drink and I don't want to fight.
9.
Lo#er 04:45
You make me feel so sick. the way you talk to each other. and I don't think I can handle it. you're just a loser not a lover. Hey little kid, I'll get in your face, you don't want to make me mad, just one slip and I'll put you in your place, just one push and I'll make it bad. You think it's hard, being alone? imagine life watching others happy, think you could stand if I trade you this life? get your hands off my lady. My heart won't beat, but it aches for her, you don't get how much she's worth, trade it in before it hurts, you hurt her, I'll hurt you too. I never claimed that I was nice, never said I'd hold my tongue, kiss her once I'll cut you twice, you don't know where I came from.
10.
DNA 04:45
Life through death throughout the ages, evolutional supremacy, virulent bacteriophages, beautiful biologically. My DNA, my genetic sequence, demands, a little reform. retrovirus crack the secret, man is dead but life goes on. Technocratic indiscretion, removing humanity, can you forgive without confession? Christ removed by surgery.
11.
12.
Kiss my bandwidth, share with me, join the pirate rhapsody, network streaming data gold, information overload. Information will be free, manifesto destiny, we write the code to span the globe, we ride fibre to the node. I don't know where I would be, without my connectivity. And I have never screamed so loud, since I found the wire to the crowd. See it's not all thieves, and it's not all theft, not all data gets converted, but we save what's left. We're the data jackers, the phreaks and the hackers, it's not to be lauded, but we're what you need.
13.
Rolling around an empty town, no man alive in the zombie crowd, cocaine in a cocktail shaker, I wanna pull your circuit breaker. Up the punks as the petrol flies, billboards carving up the skies, no disgrace to hide your face, media will only lie. And it goes like this. Baby why you got to hide, I think we've been here before, punks and nerds that you adore, watch us tearing up the floor. Maybe it's no revolution, could be it's just more confusion, waiting for the bombs to hit, but I don't really give a shit. Put the pedal to the metal, give the power to the rebel, when the 5-0 comes to kick in your door. Would you fight back or would you relax? Just a petty little pirate on the cell block floor. Too much to handle, blow out the candle, hide in the dark 'til it all goes away. When the power comes back they're quick to attack, can't shut this down it's built this way.
14.
You got me locked up in chains, handcuffs and cigarettes. I'll never quit, I don't know how to submit, but I don't think I'll ever know you that way again. See you and me, we're the same, no gods no master, and noone to blame. Except for me, you blame me, I blame me too so I guess I'm the fool. See I'm a strange kind of rebel, keep your hands away, you don't know where I've been, I'm your lover unthroned, I scratch you where you like it, but I'm still sleeping alone. So many things I'd like to say, but you don't feel that way, fine by me, damn it all, but damn if I don't want your body, shove you up against the wall. Call me aggressive, call me obscene, but you've always called me sir when you've invaded my dreams. See these handcuffs and chains, I'd like to turn the tables on you, mix this ecstasy with pain.
15.
I can't sleep. (tonight) I can't dream. (tonight) Feels like I'm just another machine. I can't sleep. (tonight) I can't dream. (tonight) Feels like the world is a distant scream. I can't eat. (tonight) I can't drink. (tonight) don't have the time to even stop and think. I can't breathe. (tonight) I can't see. (tonight) Only alive until my organs fail me. Summer sun will never warm my skin. I can burn before I feel it in me. And on a winters day, I don't fear the cold, matches my heart and it makes me feel nothing. I can't die. (tonight) I can't leave. (tonight) My veins on fire from the drugs in my blood. I can't cry. (tonight) I can't weep. (tonight) I toss and turn under my choking sheets. I can't hurt. (tonight) I can't fight. (tonight) Turn up the power til it blows out the light. I can't run. (tonight) I can't hide. (tonight) I've got a rotting feeling deep down inside. Would that I could feel again, would that I could see, would that I had more of nothing, less of everything. Would that I could kill contention, murder apathy, take this empty plot and build a poison factory. Split an atom, equal parts, perfect and destructive, to break things down to building blocks, the concept is seductive. Wind will whistle as I work, but my muscles never ache, doctors tell me that I'm sick, there's many pills to take.

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Includes Bandcamp exclusive booklet; "Curse Words"

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released July 20, 2012

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Patient Zero UK

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